LEARN TO SAY " NO "

Be confident, straight forward, courageous and never hesitate to say 'NO' when it is so demanded by situation. Your slight courage in saying 'NO' can sometimes save you from unpleasantness of the whole life time. Have your independent personality which should stand like a rock amidst even severe opposition if you are right. Also have the courage to raise your voice against any injustice or wrong being done. If you want to become great and unique, you will have to be different from the rest of the crowd. However being straight forward shouldn't be confused with being arrogant. It is possible to be straightforward while still remaining polite and respectful. If possible, you can also explain the reasons to the other party for saying 'NO' .

Some people say that by saying 'NO' other person may feel annoyed and displeased, but, remember that your purpose in this life is not to please others. Your aim is self development. Pleasure and displeasure of another person depends more of his own mentality rather than on what you say. For example, if a person is of negative mentality, he will view everything negatively no matter what you say or do.

ALWAYS REMAIN OPTIMISTIC

No matter how many failures you gave undergone in achieving a task, still remain optimistic, about your success. Remember there is no force on earth or in heaven which can prevent you from achieving what you want to achieve provided you are determined for a right cause. The requirement is only a determined mind with firm faith in God.

Also remember that not even the slightest effort ever made by you goes in vain. This is the law of the nature. Various efforts, pains, discomforts borne by you now will definitely bring fruits later or sooner.

So even when things seem worst, don't quit and stick to the fight. You never know how close you are and you might succeed with another blow. The quotation: 'In your failure lies the secret of you success' has been very thoughtfully written. Success/Failure, Pleasure/Pain, Night/Day e.t.c. are the two faces of the same coin and one can't be separated from the other. So where there is one, another is bound to be there as per natural laws. There is no need to be upset on account of this.

ELIMINATE EGO AND DOORSHIP FEELING

In all the works or things you do, have the attitude that it is God's work and you are doing it under His guidance as a servant. He is the actual doer. You are simply a medium or an instrument in His hands. After completion of the work, again surrender it to God with reverence and humility. Never develop ego that it is you who could do this work and so you now expect admiration and reward for this. Because it is a fact of life that you, on your own, can't really do anything unless supported by God because of so many uncertainties associated with everything.

Also eliminate the ego of name, fame, property, wealth, family e.t.c. because all these things are transient and will vanish some day. They have been given to you temporarily by the grace of God. Ego is a veil which doesn't allow you to come near to God. As soon as ego dissolves, you come face to face with God.

AVOID MAKING REMARKS / COMMENTS / ADVICE TO OTHERS

Concentrate only on your progress in life. Don't waste time in bothering and interfering n what others are doing. Also avoid making remarks, comments and finding faults about other's works because you are still not fit to do that. Only a person who has achieved perfection is fit to make a remark or comment upon others.

Some people are in the habit of giving unnecessary advice to everyone whether asked for or not. Here also, you should give advice only when asked for and if you are not acquainted with the matter, apologize instead of giving wrong advice. Similarly, any preaching which you want to give for the benefit of others, it is better to impart that from your behaviour rather than from words. Then it will have more weight age and force. Also remember that you can't mend any person against his own will.

If you are in a managerial position where you have to get the work done from your subordinates, it is inevitable for you to make comments/remarks/ advice about their works, but, again it should be made in the spirit of suggestion and no attitude of ego and domination should be involved.

CONCENTRATION

As physical exercise strengthen the body, concentration increases the strength of mind. Strong mind is not easily affected or disturbed by trials and tribulations of life. For improving concentration whatever activity we may be engaged in,we should try to be totally absorbed in it, however trivial it may be. At that time, except this activity the whole world should be dead for us. For example, even if we are eating a fruit at a moment, we should completely relish each morsel of fruit with our attention totally dedicated to it. If we are bathing , we should relish this activity fully, deriving maximum benefit from it by keeping our attention totally anchored to it. If you are reading a book, be totally absorbed in it for that time oblivious of any other thing. You should also learn to concentrate on uninteresting things also to develop real control of mind. Concentration in other words, means to learn to remain in the present moment which is the most desirable feature for success and happiness in life.